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PURITY OF HEART OUTREACH MINISTRIES

"Co-dependancy"?
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So what do you think???
 
 

We live in one interessssting world! ...Don't we?
 
Society has such a great way of just explaining (or explaining away!) everything in life! ...And too such extremes!
 
It seems that there are more labels today on people, behaviors, etc. Then Carter makes their, "little liver pills".
 
Even throwing "blankets" over many behaviors which are quite normal for us as human beings! Making people panic. Thinking that they (everyone, or a loved one) has one kind of condition, or another!
 
  .....As if being human itself is some kind of disease.
 
Such as children. When children are "labeled" hyper in school. Have behavorial problems, etc. They are given medication to slow them down. Making many of them "lethargic". So much that many parents wonder why their kids personalities have changed!
 
Or medicine is freely given out to those who are depressed ( or unhappy). Or have problems with depression. Now, am I saying that all who take medication should not be taking it? No, of course not. But what I am saying is this. That it would seem that medicine is being given out much too freely these days! Like candy to children on halloweeen!!
 
It would seem that society has gone to "extremes". And that it is, "pop culture" to try and give everyone and everything thing a label!
 
Take for instance co-dependancy!
 
This what the Merriam-Webster dictionary says:
 
Codependancy-coĚdeĚpenĚdenĚcy: a psychological condition or a relationship in which a person is controlled or manipulated by another who is affected with a pathological condition (as an addiction to alcohol or heroin); broadly : dependence on the needs of or control by another.
 
Codependancy was once termed only (many years ago), in the terms of someone who had a substance addiction. And was dependant on another. But now it has been broadened to include relationships (apart from drugs, alcohol, etc.).
 
Now, are there unhealthy relationships? Yes! Those in which one person uses another. And does not care for the needs of the other person. Only what they can get from that relationship. That is obviously harmful to the one on the receiving end! ...Eh?
 
But what is really sad is this. It would seem that society places negative views on natural human emotions, traits, desires, etc. Many things which are not actually negative at all!
 
Such as the need to be loved. We all have that need. it is God given! It is, "in-bred" within us. It is inheritently in our make up!
 
Afterall, God is the creator of our heart:
 
 "He fashions their hearts individually;
          He considers all their works."

                (Psalm 33:15 NKJV)
 
And love itself? Is what God is:
 
 "He who does not love does not know God, for God is love."
 
                        (1 John 4:8 NKJV)
 
Yet it would seem that some in society. Would have us believe. That having that "need" for love is actually unhealthy! That we should just be able to play the "lone sparrow". And go through this life on our own! "Everyone for themself".
 
But yet God Himself, right after creating Adam. Saw that Adam needed a helpmate, a companion:
 
 "And the LORD God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”
 
                          (Genesis 2:18 NKJV)
 
Yet those who want to be in relationships are often deemed "needy". Even though the need for companionship is God given!
 
Interesting huh?
 
Now, on the "flipside". Is there anything wrong with wanting to be alone? No, of course not! But yet even in this state. We still have the need for companionship and fellowship with others!
 
Especially as believers in Christ:
 
 "But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin."
 
                      (1 John 1:7 NKJV)
 
 "that which we have seen and heard we declare to you, that you also may have fellowship with us; and truly our fellowship is with the Father and with His Son Jesus Christ."
 
                      (1 John 1:3 NKJV)
 
Afterall, we as believers, are the body of Christ:
 
 "Now you are the body of Christ, and members individually."
 
                  (1 Corinthians 12:27 NKJV)
 
We need to have the fellowship of others. It IS God given!
 
And what about those who care for the needs of others? Espcecially those who put other's needs above their own. Today's society would have us believe this to be a "co-dependant" behavior. But yet are we not called to love?
 
 "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another.
 
                          (John 13:34 NKJV)
 
And serve:
 
 "For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another."
 
                    (Galatians 5:13 NKJV)
 
And care:
 
that there should be no schism in the body, but that the members should have the same care for one another. And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; or if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it."
 
                (1 Corinthians 12:25-26 NKJV)
 
So would that make those who love, serve, care for others wrong? Such as the apostles. Who spent their lives spreading the gospel. Loving, caring and serving others. Or Mother Theresa who spent her life caring for the poor of India? Putting others above herself!
 
Or our Lord as He looked over Jerusalem?
Heart broken over their turning away from Him. Wanting them to come back to Him:
 
“O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the one who kills the prophets and stones those who are sent to her! How often I wanted to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing!"
 
                      (Matthew 25:37 NKJV)
 
Giving Himself for us:
 
“I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd gives His life for the sheep."
 
                          (John 10:11 NKJV)
 
Would anyone ever dare label Him for loving us? And giving His life for us?
 
 "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved."

 
                     (John 3:16-17 NKJV)
 
Hopefully not (for their sakes)! But in this world you never know ...?
 
Think about marriage itself! This is what the word tell us:
 
 "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself."
 
                         (Ephesians 5:22-28 NKJV)
 
Yet the world says that submitting to your husband is ridiculous. That a person who would love the other to the point of selflessness is "co-dependant". But just look at the world! And see how their views on marriage have worked out!!
 
Does the divorce rate not say enough?!
 
The world has really gotten many things "backwards". But what do we expect from a world that is fallen so badly? A world in which, "evil is called good", and "good evil"!
 
Just as in Isaiah's day:
 
 "Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil;
       Who put darkness for light, and light for  darkness;
       Who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter
          Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes,
       And prudent in their own sight!"
 
                    (Isaiah 5:20-21 NKJV)
 
So what about other natural emotions?
 
Like jealosuy. Is jealosuy itself a sin? No.
 
The Bible tells us that God Himself can be jealous:
 
 "For the LORD your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God."

 
                (Deuteronomy 4:24 NKJV)
 
And that He is jealous when we turn from Him:
 
 "Or do we provoke the Lord to jealousy? Are we stronger than He?"
 
               (1 Corinthians 10:22 NKJV)
 
Now, would anyone dare tell the Lord He was wrong?  ...I think not!
 
Remember He is righteous:
 
 "The LORD is righteous in all His ways,
          Gracious in all His works."
 
               (Psalm 145:17 NKJV)
 
He is God:
 
 "Therefore know this day, and consider it in your heart, that the LORD Himself is God in heaven above and on the earth beneath; there is no other."
 
                (Deuteronomy 4:39 NKJV)
 
He created the heavens and the earth:
 
 "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth."
 
                        (Genesis 1:1 NKJV)
 
He is justified IN ALL He does. He answers to NO ONE:
 
 "Certainly not! Indeed, let God be true but every man a liar. As it is written:

      That You may be justified in Your words,
      And may overcome when You are judged.”

 
                     (Romans 3:4 NKJV)
 
But the world would have you believe. That having jelaous feelings is wrong!
 
Now, listen VERY closely!
 
Can you sin in your jealousy? 
 
Yes! Absolutely!!
 
Afterall, if your spouse were acting inappropriately with a person of the opposite sex? Would you not be jealous? Of course! Would you be justified? Absolutely! The thing you must not do though (with the Lord's help) is sin in this!!
 
You see we are created as emotional beings. They cannot just be "bottled up" and pushed aside (buried, etc.). Even those that seem successful at it? Only end up burying them to open up later! Affecting MANY areas of their lives!! Like a "pandora's box" (for more info click here: The Pain of Brokenness).
 
We are emotional beings! Yet society, in it's "extremes". Seems to think that just being human is wrong! That we need drugs to "control" us.
 
 ...What a great world we live in huh?
 
Now, what about anger? Is anger a sin? No!
 
Even God Himself becomes angry:
 
 "So the anger of the LORD was kindled against Moses, and He said: "Is not Aaron the Levite your brother? I know that he can speak well. And look, he is also coming out to meet you. When he sees you, he will be glad in his heart."
 
                    (Exodus 4:14 NKJV)
 
Yet society seems to think that anger is wrong! Now, can it become wrong? Well, if our anger is not justified (Matthew 5:22). Or we allow ourselves to sin in our anger. Than the answer is "yes". But having anger itself does not constitute a sin!
 
We are not to sin in our anger. Just as the Bible says:
 
Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath,"
 
                    (Ephesians 4:26 NKJV)
 
But the world would have us to believe. That we must be able to just "turn off" any feelings! ....Or we just may need medication (?).
 
You see it all comes down to this. The more we listen to the world. And the less we listen to God and His word. The more we will just "fall" on our faces. And continue to "de-humanize" ourselves to the point of feeling "nothing". Becoming "numb".
 
But in the end? It's not nothing that we will feel. We just wont know what to feel! And when we do feel? We won't have a clue as to what is really going on within ourselves! ...And we will be just like the rest of the world.    ....Just as broken!
 
You see we live in such a "pop culture" of non-sense. That we are running around like, "chickens with our heads cut off". Wondering, "which way is up?" And "which way is down?"
 
So consider this. Whenever you hear the world. Just "spewing out" more venomous nonsense. You want the truth? Go to the word and study it! Not popular magazines, newspapers and the latest TV talk shows!
 
You see we do not need to use the world's reasoning skills!
 
Afterall, we should really "catch a clue", how well that has worked out over the years! How well the world has reasoned out everything else. And what it has led too:
 
 "There is a way that seems right
     to a man,
  But its end is the way of death."
 
        (Proverbs 14:12 NKJV)
 
We need to stay in God's word and know what the truth really is!
 
What God's word says:
 
 "All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness,"
 
                     (2 Timothy 3:16 NKJV)
 
So instead of listening to everything society says. Weigh it against what God's word says! Then you will know the truth!!
 
 .....And you may just be suprised!!!
 
And ask yourself this one thing. How well is the world's advice working out for you?
 
 
Need I say more??
 
 

Rev. John Heintzman
Evangelist Non-Denominational
POHOM
 
Any questions, comments, prayer requests?
 

POHOM Columbus, Ohio
 
 
 
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